Welcome!

Hernan (New Realities)

Hernan (New Realities)

welcome to the winning ugly podcast, a place where we are real, raw, entertaining, energizing, and encouraging come experience real conversations that go deep and relationships that extend through the media to overcome testing times. We can't continue to keep our trials and tragic stories to ourselves. The people you will hear from are facing you're ugly, stepping out of their comfort zone and sharing your victory storms are a guarantee in life. And when they come, we wanted e right here, building you up and empowering you to win ugly


welcome to the winning ugly podcast. I'm your host, Trish, and I have with me my hubby cohost Emory.

Of course, the voice is here and it's going to be a great show. I'm very excited. Uh, the guests that we have on is a good friend of ours and we've had, uh, plenty of good times together. So, uh, looking forward to it guys. Listen to the whole show because you will enjoy it.

Yeah. Starting this podcast has encouraged me in so many ways. I am always looking to be uplifted. I hope it has done that for you too. We would love to hear those stories. So subscribe to the podcast and leave us a rating and review. We would be so thankful for you to do that. It only takes a minute. Press pause and just go do it. Thanks y'all. So you're in for a real treat. As Emory said, our guest today is a longtime friend who is so passionate about international affairs or nun. Welcome to the show.

Thank you trays. I'm looking forward to be in this show. I know very good things about it. I've heard a lot of good things, so I'm very pleased and an honor to be in your show.

Hmm. Well thank you and thanks so much for joining. Yeah,

yeah, we're happy to have you man. It's, it's uh, I'm glad we finally got a chance to book you. And uh, I think the audience is really gonna enjoy your story. Thank you guys.

And His name is Aranon, so it's spelled h, e r, n, a, N, and it's pronounced like air [inaudible] air. You breathe the non bread that you eat. [inaudible] silence in a span. Exactly. So I have none. So if you want to sound pretty cool and impress some of your friends and think, make them think you know Spanish, just say, hey, I have a friend whose name is Adnan.

Yeah. If the ages did that, beginning of the, of the word dumb, pronounce it exactly.

So non lives far away from his home country. He has always been a faithful, honest, and giving friend to us. He always tells us what's on his mind and sometimes a little too honest.

Yeah. Don't ask it or not a question if you don't want to know the answer. Right.

And he is so giving of his time and his delicious food that he cooks. He's a great chef. Not like, oh, well you can barbecue the heck out of.

Yeah, you make some killer steaks, man. It's that salt, right? The Brazilians, Brazilian salt.

Speaking of his wife, she is from Brazil and he has a beautiful family and they're just so loving and kind. So thank you again for being such a good friend. Thank you guys. And are not as from Quito, Ecuador,

beautiful city located in the middle of the world. That's right. Quatre line. Everybody thinks we have very hot environment, a lot of eh, you know, like Africa. But no, because we are in surrounded by the Andes and that's like a huge air conditioning system and the weather is perfect. Yeah, it's beautiful. I've been there, I enjoyed it.

We can attest to that. It's perfect. But you moved to the u s in 1995 almost 25 years ago, and you have been living in the south east since, and we've also traveled to Ecuador with your family and we stayed with your family. His family has a, an estate. So imagine this beautiful house, which is on a beautiful piece of land with huge gates protecting the property and a beautifully crafted in ground pool and a banquet room. But your father who is aging actually calls it as bar where he has all this friends to come over.

He's excused to have friends every weekend. I hear that he, it was a restaurant at some point, right? It was, but it was an excuse really never meant to be a business. Of course. Very slick. It's very slick. I like that.

Which, speaking of business, it's actually in Spanish called Hacienda, which is derived from the word has said or Haciendo, which means to make our be making and were largely business enterprises consisting of various moneymaking ventures. And in this case are nuns. Dad was a well known dentist and people would go to his home to have their teeth worked on.

He did have some pearly whites. I do remember that day he, oh, he was always very concerned about the community and the surrounding community is a kind of leftover of the huge CN that's owned by the, the priest, the Catholic priest. And when they left power in that area, they gave away land. And most of the people that live around my parents' property or the old employees of the SCM. Okay. So my dad dad does in the property just for this group of poor people. That's really good. That's really, yeah. And what was the valley,

cause there's, there's a couple different valleys, right. And one is Tim bacco and the other one is Sandra Feo. We are in San Raphea. So I thought,

okay, cool. Um, so that there was a main dwelling where your family lived, your mom and dad, and then they had two other small houses on the property, which is where we stayed in one of them and when we arrived to Ecuador before or nine in his family, because we lived in Columbia, South America, and the flight was really short, so his family wanted to take care of us and bring us into their home and his sweet sister invited. She is,

she was really sweet man. My Sis, she was a good person.

She invited us to,

everybody in all of them speaks, speak English in the house. You know that where they're highly, I'm Martha. Martha, my sister that you're going to talk about is a linguistics. He's now a professor and she's like a triple doctorate. [inaudible]. She speaks English pretty well. That's why she was brave enough to get you invited.

Yeah, he's in person. Very good friend and she invited us into her home with kittens. The kittens. Yeah, she invited us, her, us. She invited us into her home, which is one of the houses on the property as well, to have a dinner, which consisted of sausage, white rice and a Friday

[inaudible]. You gotta put eggs on top of it, you know, of course in Latin cultures it's like they were like, we got this, that, what else? It put an egg on it. It's always everything has an egg one. I love it. Avocado, if you have an avocado, I could go to as well. Eggs, avocado. Rice is very typical and make that, yeah, absolutely. Yes.

Not nothing like eating your colors all white and beige, but it was [inaudible]. Yes. We did not have that that night. That may have, that would have maybe saved the meal, but no, saving that meal. I did say we had sausage and the sausage to go along with the white rice and the white egg was also white, so it was dead. Yeah. But give us a little bit more details about life in Ecuador. What it's like the food, maybe the different kind of,

Oh, and a side note before you start the food is really good and equitable. Yeah, I love it a lot. I had a lot of restaurants, a lot of street food. It was delicious. Very fresh from the field to the your table. Most of it is very fresh. But the most amazing thing about Ecuador's food is the fruits, the variety. You can grow anything. Everything is, we can say that you can plant your broom, stick in the backyard and it will grow something. Right? That's again, it is amazing. Yes. So yeah, food in Ecuador is awesome, Eh, but what do you want to know exactly?

Well, what about the currency or um, transportation,

right. Okay. Ecuador, it's following pretty closely to the policies in the United States. We are very fun of the United States. And to the point that in 2003 the currency that was super before change to be dollars. So we manage dollars and we have the same coined the we have here in the United States. And I think it helped the economy greatly because, eh, it controlled the way in which the banks put their interest, eh, before when they have the, the suppress, eh, interest went up to 60, 40, 70%. Now with the dollar, we have to be aware of what's going on in the world, in the United States. So interests, no, don't go up so much. They're pretty similar. I'm sure that was the idea of going to dollar. Correct. They figured he would help out. Yes.

How has your public transportation system,

well, Eh, the majority of people in Ecuador are eh, working class. So public transportation is vital, is very important. It's so you can have a public transportation and every single little plays in the whole country, Eh, you just need to walk about maybe one block or two and you will be able to get any public transportation that you need. And the last, uh, 10 years with a booming of oil, we had a lot of money and the country became more, eh, able to afford cars. So that's a big problem right now. A lot of people

were able to buy more cars. So the roads were not designed to the amount of the people having that, that a means of transportation. So now there's a conflict between public transportation and private transportation. And because we have so many cars, it's an issue. But Eh, I think, Eh, most of the people are still managing with the public transportation means of, of, of going everywhere they need.

And that seems like to be a problem in a lot of, uh, seven Macon Latin countries. Cause and where I lived in Bogota and all the surrounding Pueblos, it was the same thing. You know, people were buying cars, more cars, more people were driving. Yeah. And the roads were just so, you know, jammed up. So yeah, I think that is probably a generic general problem. The last administration was very thoughtful and they, what they focus is in designing and building more roads. And the idea was to try to get, especially the agricultural production out to the roads and to the, to the cities. And I think that they had a great job and there's a lot of more development and transportation because of the new growth on, on the roads, a construction. So that's a good thing that happened in Ecuador in the last 15 years. Yes.

Awesome. What about attractions? One thing that comes to mind when we were there is the Cotopaxi and it was beautiful when we went on the train with your family. I think we were able to see it briefly, but what are some attraction?

Well, an interesting thing about Ecuador is that you can go to the mountains, Eh, 18,000 is a freed, evolve the ocean level and an hour and then you can get another car and go for another two hours in good down to zero to the coastal level. And it's because of the Andes and everything is very, very close to here together. And I would say that the most attractive thing of Ecuador is the variety of these areas in nature and landscapes that you can enjoy, not moving very far away from what you want it to go, Eh, the mountains that, no mountains. We have the largest, the highest volcano in the world that's got the epoxy, as you said, and is very close to the capitol. And then a lot of other snow mountains around the city of Quito and many lakes. And then you can also have a lot of eh, very beautiful beaches, uh, outside of, of the Andes going down to only four hours away from the mountains. So everything is very close to what you want to let it go.

One of my most memorable trips whenever we were in Ecuador, we went to a coffee farm, which was in a cloud forest and it was in the town of Mena.

Should we tell that story? I know we didn't run another, this was in part of the script, but, uh, we don't mean that story. It's a great story, isn't it? I thought it was awesome.

The rainforest is, is a beautiful place. Yeah, you're right. Yeah, that's, that's very close to the mountains. Very close to the city. And it's going down to the lid to the color.

And what we didn't know when we were in the town, cause I'm this guy Emory's about to tell the story, but he brought us to, I'm going to call him Jack. Yes. That's not his real name. Jack Daniels. Alias Jake. So he brought us to this restaurant and when we were there, there are so many Americans and people, Australia people.

Yeah. A lot of European. That that area that you went is very popular. It's an echo, echo, ecological tourism area. Like Hippieville, tippy, Hippieville. Sure. Yes. Yeah. Yeah. So we went to a, um, I guess it would be like what's a place where people bring their, uh, artisinal stuff? Feria yeah. Fadel yeah. Fair. Yeah. So we went to this little fair and I had a good time, a really nice, this guy had some coffee, thought

it was cool because who doesn't like coffee? Do you drink the coffee? They make it there. A hammered back. It was awesome while I drilled it. Yeah. And it's organic. It's dude had organic coffee. I'm excited. Right? We hook it up. You take a plain black horse. Okay. I mean, I'm agreeing to go, but I'm not that green. No plain black coffee. It's the only way I drink coffee. Oh my goodness. So we meet, this guy speaks really good English, so we hope we hit it off really well. Great Guy. And he says tomorrow if you want to come to my coffee thinker until the farm to the farm, I'll bring you guys. Wow. So we don't know this guy's last name. Yeah, he's gonna kidnap you. We're going to call him Jack Money. I'm going to call him Jack. Is that his name? So we tell Jack. Yeah man, let's do it. But we don't know Jack's last name. We don't know where Jack comes from

and I have to pause at this point in time. So we, yeah,

this is a bad idea is what I'm trying to afford this, you know, bad idea. Not In Ecuador. No problem. It's just not the new place. You might want to have a little a, what do you call it? A common sense. Cautious. Like do I have common sense? None. I have no comments. I just go for it. We can go to Ecuador is fine. You have got realized you the, and that's going to mess with this story is gonna is gonna at the end. Everyone's gonna know.

So I have to say at this point, we stayed in Ecuador for two weeks. We were not with Arnon at this point in time. We were with another family in a different valley and this family was advising us

not to do what we're about to do. So continue. So when you see these gringo was on the news and they tell you what they did and you're like, yeah, they totally deserved, they told you that was us and what we're about to do. That's fine. I will tell you. Go ahead. And of course you would have, yes, you have to watch you. Of course. So we tell Jack, yes, we are in of course. So we meet Jack in the middle of downtown Quito at a random place. Not Smart. Jack picks us up. Jack says, uh, I've got a, I've got to go to a mechanic shop to get another car or something. So this thing is already starting off weird.

And then he says, I need to make a pit stop at Oh

yeah. So we go to the, uh, to, to the mechanic shop. Right. And we get into a car. Apparently we don't know what's going on. So we were back in his car and we headed to the cloud forests. Is that what it's called? Yeah. Yeah. So Jack in the middle of the road, we're already like, there's no one around. If anything happens, we're toast. Right. Toast.

And he does bring along his dog that has long haired little, yeah.

Oh yeah. He was high, which I don't remember the dog. That dog is object to. The dog's name was Jack Too. Oh my goodness. So Jack One, he's driving Jack to the dog. So he drive. So Jack's drive and all of a sudden jack out of middle of nowhere pulls out from the left side. I'm a teddy. Huge machete. Yes, he does. So far. We've got a random mechanic car where he's pulling out machetes on us. He says this, hey guys, don't worry. I have a machete if you will, but you don't need to be afraid of this. So we're thinking, yeah. Is this like code for jump out the car or is he really gonna you know,

and mind you, our phones at this point only work in Wifi. We are in the middle of nowhere. Okay. So we are freaking out. Emory's in the front seats. Sweating. I'm in the back seat, not knowing what,

I'm just ready for the machete to come out when we get off the time. The dog is with your head out of the window. Yeah. Jack Toucan. Careless Jack too is hanging out doing this thing. So we finally get to the, the cloud forest and uh, we get to pick coffee. We get to just hang out with him. And he had these a long, remember those big trees? Yeah,

it's Kanya. They are what? You

can tap on any of that one. [inaudible] with a straw. So he's tapping these uh, these trees. Yes. And we take a straw, not a straw like yellow thinking there's a plant nearby. Correct. It acts like a straw. Correct. You take that, stick it in this tree and you can drink cold water. It was incredible. Yes. It really,

really was one of the most amazing trips that I've ever been on. And this guy was special place. Amazing. And we are actually still,

yeah, Jack, we follow Jack on Facebook and he is not a murderer or anything. He's a great guy. You know what? I don't know what you just told me this. He's from Quito. Right? You never told me about it, but nominally we got it finished. I don't want you didn't tell me about him. I don't know that what you're talking about. But I did want to say something about Jack Jack's friend. A bruise beer. Oh, you remember this? That's good. That's a good sign of course. But Jack's, okay. So Jay went out. Jack gave us a bunch of beer, right? A bunch of bottles up here. Exactly. That's what I'm getting too. So, so Jack's is, uh, this is Jack One. Jack Two Jack twos. The dog. So follow along. So Jack, Jackie says, Hey, Emory, you know, here's you know, seven, eight, nine bottles of beer.

You know, my friend just started brewing beer, but he did the carbonation wrong when he, when he bottled him. I don't know what that means. I know it was beautiful being I love. So he says a, so he's telling me this but it's not registering on what that means. So he says that means when you go to open it, you need to tilt it be outside. Right. But of course like 40% of what's gonna fly out and then you can drink, which is why he gave me all the beans and then we had it at your, you're a state the I remember. Yes. Exploding beer.

It was the successful, it was coffee touring trip.
Yes. What happened to the dog? Everything. Jack two is still alive. I think I've seen him on Facebook

and he's had, he's had a baby. Um, no, no, the big Jack One. Jack one had a baby. Um, I think he's doing good. Like, we've talked to him a few times, but

you have to tell me about him next time so I can go visit. I will. Um, I will text you the, has a name of the, uh, I wanna meet him. It's like, uh, it's, it's altitude. It's, it's in Spanish though, but it's like altitude 1600. Okay. I'll text mountains. Yes. Alright. Alright, go ahead.

But he's a very cool guy and he has a little trailer now that he drives around town and he serves coffee and artifice, his own coffee. That's all great. Good Dude. So yeah, y'all should go visit Ecuador. Everyone should go. Um, Galapagos islands sausage. Yes. Um, but in Ecuador you were a successful architect then at the prime age of 33, you took a vacation to the u s

I was the first. I can tell you this. I was the first 26 years old architect building a building on the main park in downtown Ecuador. I was the, the youngest architect building there. So you got a promising they didn't like it. They gave me a very hard time. Cause you were young. Very young. Yes. Ornery. Oh yes. And I've never, I've never known that side of you. Yes. But I did everything I wanted all the time.

So you took your vacation here at the prime age of 33 and then what?

Well, I've fallen in love with the United States. I landed first in Buckhead, Atlanta with very nice people view beautiful parties. So I said if the United States like this, I'm going to stay here forever. And that's what I did as any other immigrant. You know when you come here you are as a like a baby just born like a new start. You got be start everything from scratch, making him the hardest thing I think is to make everybody understand exactly what you do and what you are worth. Yeah. Cause that's the most difficult thing I think for immigrants that to make everybody understand how much are you worth, how was, how was your body? You did that. That's the most difficult thing. And so I had to do it in a very hard way. Difficult had to fight for every little space that I had. I worked with the University of Alabama for me years and I did a lot of research on new Latinos in the southeast, has very, very, very successful projects there with them.

And then I just wanted to start as an entrepreneur doing a marketing company, starting all a Latino in Birmingham in 2003 Eh, it was very successful. We were growing 100% per year until 2008 when the depression came and we had a radio station and newspaper. I still, we still have that radio station today, but it was huge then. And then in 2009 Eh, most of us, many people that probably listening to this conversation had to change gears and look for other things to do. I want a BBA. Compass Bank was one of my clients and I accepted a job with them and I started working with them and I'm a financial analyst with them right now, but I still have all the Latino as a business man. Oh. And I got my, my license in real estate. Oh, that's true. Yeah, that's the most recent. So you did a good pivot. Oh yeah, he's the word these days. Right. Because I was a business owner and my goal, my focus now is to support all of all of the small business owners that I know from Philippines and many other countries, especially international people that are now new Americans. Yeah. They'll want to develop their business or company. So my focus in real estate will be to help them to gain their wealth. That's great man. That's ADSL. Good thing to be doing. Yes. I hope that can help with that.

Well good. Well, we're going to do move into some fun questions before we move into your story, but it's been fun so far. Oh, well good. Do you remember your first job as a kid?

My first job was sweeping seven floors in a condo next to my house when I was a kid. My Dad challenges to challenged me to get a job, so I just went to the next door building. I said, if I can sweep the floors, you know, the the stairs and they gave me the job and I did that for like six months.

Wow. Did you enjoy it? No, but I made money and I bought the toys. I bought toys where my kid or my siblings. Yeah. I'll tell you guys since you all know that I am from the swamps. My, my first job was actually to clean turtle eggs. That's fun. Well, well do you have a hidden talent? He then talent, Eh, I see the future. Oh my, no, no, no, no. I really thought your hidden talent was that you can sing Karaoke really well because you love to Karaoke. I love singing. You do love singing. You are pretty good. Again, thank you. Better than I think a lot of Karaoke people have an inflated, you know what I mean? Well, skill set, but you're not bad. I'd give you a six. I'll give you this.

Well, have you ever seen with a Chinese Person Karaoke? I have Japanese, but I have some Asian friends that are, that are very good at Karaoke. They are great, but I know better than to compete with them because they, they've got it and I don't, yeah, I'm not a good singer, but I don't think I'm good at karate. But thank you guys.

I think you're six and you said that your favorite guy that you like the favorite artists do you like to use as Jim Croce, which I had no idea. Well who that was and make and fall big American folk rock singer Songwriter, which was from the sixties and seventies I looked that up and I had no idea to sing. Just sing Jean [inaudible] sing like a one melody, one one line of a person.

If I can save time in a bottle, I know what it is. The first thing that I like to do, this is going to be a great show.

Yeah. I feel like the TV behind us, we need a whip that bad boy up with some. Yeah, he's actually one liners. There's a TV behind us, but specifically for Karaoke. Jim Croce was great. [inaudible] need to know about him. Absolutely. Okay, well last place you vacationed.

Yeah, the Eh, Baltic Sea, beautiful towns, little towns. We had the opportunity to go down on the, in most of the ports and those little villages and cities in Europe, the people are very different though. That's very weird. They don't. They don't make eye contact really. Maybe because I was the only brown color person in that little area. They didn't look at me, but they, they are beautiful, really very different people. I felt like I needed to get a new, a place I've just visited. His mind's not the Baltic Sea man, the, the, all of the [inaudible], his area. All of those people are so fit. They are very, very fit and then because they'd probably walk a lot more than us. Absolutely. That doesn't that thing that are rich. Are you a Facebook guy or an Instagram guy? Eh. Facebook old fashioned. Sure. Yes. Go to the classic steel. Yeah. Facebook is sale

coffee or tea? Coffee, black cream. Sugar. A black with a little milk. Okay. Yes.

[inaudible] are you being in the sweets at all? No. No. See I was eat a steak instead of two ice creams. I don't even need to ask the question. Yes. I'm the same way, man. I love steak. I'll eat the steak with a side of steak. I tell you what, I was, listen to this. I was at a rescue one four foot four dessert steak steak. I was at this restaurant, may attrition with the Steak House and uh, you know, I've got a big steak cause I'm at a steak house and they asked, uh, you know, the side and I said green beans, I don't know. No. And she said, uh, she said, sir, I want to tell you about these green beans. There's a bacon in the green beans, chunks of bait dry. And I told her, I said, well just take out the green beans. Just bring the baking. Come on, right. Oh, I'm sorry. Love steak. Yes. The best thing in the world. All right. Baseball or football and football. Big Time. Yes, yes, of course. So you have a favorite team?

Of course, Alabama of course. Made in Alabama. Not Born in Alabama with made in Alabama. That's awesome. Very cool. So your roll tighter roll tide of course, all the, all the way.

So are non, let's move into your story of winning ugly through a new reality. Your story is about immigrants from cultures all around the world who arrived to the United States. And immediately have a disadvantage. This is your personal story and how you explain what happened to you and what others

in similar story shared with you. This is what our non-experienced and believed, believes other immigrants fight through. So if you want to start there, um, with you having to have the realization of your new reality when you came to the United States and you may be having a nonrealistic idea or um, you know, kind of go with that,

right outside of the United States, the individual has a perception of himself or herself that is very different from what a has to become in America and Ecuador. In my case, I was a young, eh, architect successful and everybody knew me and I was, um, I could do everything I want it. And then I moved to the United States and suddenly a, I was nobody. That's the most difficult thing. That's the reality that most immigrants have to face and everybody will take it in a different way. Yeah. Every immigrant will phase dad in a different way and some of them will go negatively or positively. Eh, I am very grateful of the millions of immigrants that came to, to the United States. It took it in the right way and I very prosperous and join, join the culture and the yeah, and the life here in the United States and are contributing to the growth and prosperity of our country.

And I'm very sad for all of the immigrants that couldn't accept the difference between their, uh, past life in the new life. And they're not able to adapt. But that's a, that's a reality. That's a fact. And we have to learn to live with that and we have to accept it, Eh, in my case, uh, we have, I had to adapt to new realities and new challenges. And you, I think you can be more successful in the way that you can adjust to this new needs and change your life to make it work for this new requirements. And that's what I believe I did. And that's what many immigrants have to do day by day. And if you see as somebody in your life, in church or in your job or any, any, any other place in the, you know that this, this person was not born in the United States and came here later, please think about it because they are not only dealing with the, the problems that the job or the, what they are doing now in that moment requires, but they are also dealing with all of the problems that they are carrying back from their countries and this, this idea of adjusting to becoming a new person in this new society.

So be be accepting please and be understanding and Abe you can help. It will be great. We can give them a hand.

I agree with that because you know when we did live abroad for three years we sometimes did feel like we were not really accepted all the time and whenever just one person will reach out to us and say, it looks like you're having trouble doing this, let me help you. It just really encouraged us because we did a big difference. Yeah. We had a lot of things we had to deal with on our own and we didn't want to have, you know, just this one little thing that was a hindrance. Maybe it was something in the grocery store. We didn't know how to get on the bus. So I agree that it is important that we do need to reach out to our fellow brothers and sisters, even if they are from a different nationality.

I understand and understand and, and look a little forward or beyond what you can really see and say, okay, I'm going to try to make your life easier then. Yeah, that's, that's it. That's what everybody wants. That's a matter. Regardless of

you are an immigrant or not sure she'd be like that. Everyone should be on Modo. Right? Absolutely. To make everybody else your brother easier. Right? Eh, but it's so interesting. It's like, oh, different things are that even the traffic lights, the traffic lights to me where they had to live in color, it is red, green and yellow pattern is different, but it's different. The same thing. Absolutely. The, the, the, the, the spaces between the roads. The, what is it called? Um, the, the lines? No, no, the sidewalk or the, um, the median, the median. Median, absolutely. The medians are really good with roadworthy different cause

you can tell them that. So even if you know how to drive, if everything was going to be different, even, even though we drive on the same side of the road, yeah. Those adjustments add up. And I think if you're not used to that, like us, you know, like Trish was saying, moving to to Columbia or whatever, there's so many little things throughout your day.

Yeah. You know, at the end of the day you go, what did we do today? Not a whole lot, but you're exhausted because all these little things that you had to do just to get where you're going. Just the littlest things take a lot of energy, a lot of adjustments. And it is nice to, to, to have your fellow man sort of help you out. Like you're saying. That should be, it should be like that everywhere. Well even if you don't need to, it'd be don't help. It's all right. It's, of course, just, just be nice and understanding and don't get in the way. Sure. Right. Absolutely. And even, you know, guys, it's so different that even the flushing the toilet that goes the other ways, almost like, no, it's, it's, it's the, the, the, the Doodad that you, uh, push the one with the water turns in the other direction.

I think you, if you're making that up, if you're in the United States, right, it's on the left. I'm probably going to go with that for the purposes of the show, but, and the south demonstrates it goes the other way it goes, but the thing you push is complete. Like, remember the toilets in Bogota, they were like on the back of the toilet. Yeah. It's a lot to get everything and Saudi friends talk about your expectations and where are they too big compared to your new reality of the, your new life in the United States? Um, yeah. You know, you, when you are a foreigner, you have huge expectations about, about your life and the United States and southern, the, you learn the, no. Yeah. The best thing that Emeka can do come into the United States is you have very small hauled spectation cause everything is more, is more difficult to get and is not easy. So if, if you are here and you have, well I think that applies to everything in life, even have as small as the dictations. Anything you get will be better that you were expecting for. So I think, I think what we're saying is bart set the bar low. Exactly. Yeah. Yeah. But all the always do your best.

Sure. And I, I'll know you have his mom's picked h of the lowest vacations. You'll always have to go the extra mile and you all have to do more than you are required in that I think is the motto or what moves every immigrant in the United States because we want to be ahead of the game. We want to be, we want to make everybody know that we want to do our best. And I think that's common. There's an ambition there. There's a drive there for support to succeed. Yes.

How many years did it take you to adjust to this new reality?

Wow. It trays that that would just bring me to thinking on what research it says and it says that it takes about five years for a person to get a used to Justin to an environment. I realize they were not who they thought were five years for me, Eh, maybe around five, five. I don't know. It always evolves and changes. So after teen years, I think you, you will really change that. That's just an estimate. Yes. Yeah. It'd be different for everyone. Years, Trish, 10 years, Dick, 10 years.

I want to, I also want to know what did your family think when you, you know, when you moved here permanently, what were you an outcast? What were they thinking? Oh, well. Or saying, yeah.

Yeah. That is a very good question. And for the entrepreneur, for the guy or the lady that decides to move here and stay here is, it's all nice and it is in a venture for the people, for the family that stays behind or stays in their countries. It's only sadness is the only sadness for my mom. My Dad and my

brother sisters are, they're going to miss your family because they know they are, they are not going to see you. They are not gonna Eh, enjoy you as I do with the other members of the family every weekend when they get together and, and you are not, there is always that empty space. So is, is, is okay for the mood, the person that moves way and stays here and it's hard, but it's, it you are excited because this is new and it's challenging. It's a new chapter. Yeah. But for your family, for everybody else is sad. It's very sad. And that's comics I would say is the same for everybody. Eh, what I was expecting you to say that. Yeah. I think anybody, you know, would feel like that.

Um, well now that you've accepted that, you know, your new reality, um, that you're different, what were you propelled by? Were, were, was it your string being Ecuadorian or what, what were you actually propelled to get past? Maybe the let down that you had, um, the expectations that were not met, what were you propelled?

I think it's a combination, Trish. I think it has to do with your life. We pass life, your experience, your ex, your the things that you experienced before you came to the United States. But I think that every person that is different feels challenged to demonstrate and to show that you can do more or be better. When when I talked to the high school kids, Eh, especially Hispanics that moved to northeast Alabama and in my years of research I told him, you have to be very proud because you are the combination of two colors. And I made a a task. I said, okay guys, let's, let's pretend that you have a yellow Plato on one hand and then you have a blue plate. On the other hand, do you, do you understand that? Yes. Get it. Put it together, mixed it up. What do you have now is green, right?

And then I said, kids put it up, put it, put it apart, change it. Can you do that? You've already mixed it, right? You can't. I'm glad I got that right. Said so that, that that's what we are, that's what every immigrant is. You're a part of it. Now the yellow, it's the new reality. Our past blue from our live in the United States, it's a great and that's a mixed now impossible to take it apart. So that's, that's why we are now the key is to understand and accept that we are green, not yellow, no blue, yes, but we're agreeing and, and, and, and that's why we have to accept them. That will make us, that that's the strength that we have to go in life. Also the respect that we have for this new reality pro, the new color that we are m makes make as thing that Eh, we have five points from the yellow and five pounds from the blue.

So we have a little more points. Well we are in an advantage from other people that have only one color. That's what I think looking at it from, from a strength standpoint. Absolutely. I agree. That's a good illustration and I love playing it. I'm pretty sure eight Plato when I was a kid. Have you did that? Everybody did. I plus with INA, what is Plato made of? Yeah. Plus the Lena is in South America. All right, let's go with that. What does that mean? Out of Plato, they water plated though plastic. I feel like I turned out pretty good and I played Plato. Anyway, moving on. Well,

I want to know like maybe one person in particular helped you or maybe you you saw kindness from a specific neighbor or w w tell us a little bit about that. The kindness

freeze. Every single American person that I met since 1995 when I was in the United States the first time has been very helpful to me. Every single person that I got to know and met me and knew me and it was my friend helped me. I loved you the first time I met you. Thank you man. We hit it off great, but I remember where we were at and everything. I remember that. Absolutely having coffee. Yes. Pretty cool. Yes, but I'm serious and honest. I think that the, the most wonderful thing about the United States at that is that people really care and, and when you see potential in somebody, you help them. That's something very different from other countries here. Every person helps you if you are worth it. This will

save you if you do things right. If you show that you can do more than anybody else or you are really working hard for what you want, everybody will help you. Got that. So I have many, many people in my life here in the United States that have helped me to be where I am right now and I'm very grateful for that. Well, I'm thankful you're here. Yes.

So yes, you, you say that you had to go through the realization of being in a new reality to be successful, but what do you wish you knew then that you know now?

Yeah, Trish, that is a very interesting topic. When me personally as an immigrant, when, when I come here, I, I think that what we lack as foreigners is patience. And I think that if we can adjust ourselves on all train ourselves to be more patient, we can be more successful here if we come as an immigrant patient and patient in. What do you mean specifically as patients for water? What? You know what I mean? Everything here is very organized and our countries is not, is very chaotic so well you are used to go over and and jumping barriers and doing things as a train. Honestly with all of the power and you want to go from ATV and you, there's nothing in your way and you have to go in crushed. Everything got to be, that's how we leave outside of the United States here. You don't need to, it's not necessary. It's not necessary. It makes sense because everything is very organized. It's already organized for you. Correct. So we know now if we known those little details before we come here, it will be much easier. So, and I always say the United my first five years in the United States where my master's degree inpatients. Yeah, that makes sense. Well if we can

do vice versa, because when we went to Columbia it was the complete opposite. We were like

that problem you're identifying but in reverse, you know, for, for us being there, we were correct. It was frustrating a lot of times, right? Yeah, it was,

I mean, even to get Internet, we were like, we have an appointment. You're coming at this time and they will show up the next day at this at a different time. Totally. Yeah.

Yeah. And you know what guys, if we have a few two minutes to talk about, it is not our fault. There's the fault of the people that came to to colonize it. There's panniers was the, that was the best way to keep us, Eh, um, in control. Okay. Do you keep everybody this organized is the best way for them to keep it control. So it was, this is 500. The system was built like bet already. Correct. 500 years controlled chaos. Controlled chaos. Yes. It was good. I understand. They were very successful.

Um, if you had a chance for a do over, knowing what you know now, would you take that

a do lover? No. I've learned from everything I've done. I think a, I'm here and I am what I am because of what I did. No, I am okay with everything I did. Okay. And it is made you, it's made you, it's given you the skillset you have, right? Yeah. All the things that you go through, they're gonna they're going to build you up. Yes. So yeah. What do you feel most proud of? I'm very proud of my kids. Yes. Pretty cool kids. That's the most thing I think I'm very proud of them and I'm very proud of the last choices I made. Like married my wife. No, I'd say that was a good yes, it was a good choice. It's worked out well. Yes. You married, you married up though.

Absolutely. And she levels you out. She is super kind, super giving soft show skin and so y'all even each other out on the team. Good team. Good team. Make sense? Thank you. Are Non for being with us and

thank you so much. We had a blast. It was a, it was fun. I love telling these. I swear I could do like a four hour podcast with you. I'm I gonna sing. No. Okay. You can sing and we're going to impress empty record week. No, no, I'm just kidding. So thank you audience for listening and I'm again, be confident in sharing your story with someone today. You never know

who needs that encouragement and just building you up to stand Victoria's maybe when ugly. Maybe your neighbor is an immigrant. Yes, exactly that with him. Exactly. Thanks for listening guys. Appreciate it. Thank you though. When the ugly moments come, remember that light shines brightest in the dark. Love radiates brightest among hate life stance

most boldly against death.

Scott (Dropping Out)

Scott (Dropping Out)

Richie (Trauma)

Richie (Trauma)