Welcome!

Meredith (Depression)

Meredith (Depression)

Welcome to the winning ugly podcast, a place where we are real rock, entertaining, energizing, and encouraging come experience real conversations that go deep and relationships that extend through the media to overcome testing times. We can't continue to keep our trials and tragic stories to ourselves. The people you will hear from are facing. They're ugly, stepping out of their comfort zone and sharing their victory. Storms are a guarantee in life and when they come, we want to be right here building you up and empowering you to win ugly


Welcome to the winning ugly podcast. I'm your host, Trish [inaudible], and I am joined here with

my husband and cohost Emery. Hey guys, what's going on? Thanks for joining me. He's always by my side. Yes, I love you so much. I always like to say that as long as we have been married, Emory has challenged me to be a better person and to live life to the fullest. I'm good at pushing your buttons, making you try new things. Yes. He's pushing me to start this podcast, which is why we sit here today because we have lived through many winning ugly moments. So thanks babe. Not a problem. We'll be sharing our winning ugly moments with you over time. And the reason I started this podcast is because I desire to hear people's stories and see where they are today and how they had to win ugly. The one thing people bring up while they are telling me their story is that they wish someone would have shared their story because maybe it would have helped to pursue them to persevere and push through.

Yeah, I agree. I mean a lot of times too, people like to use, you know that phrase overnight success or something like that, but there's no such thing as an overnight success. I want to know about the, before all the work they had to put in all the trials and had to go through. So I think a sort of delving into that and getting to that is going to be very inspiring to people.

Yeah. Because sometimes when you hear of success or different people, you only hear from their start and then their end and you never hear the between. So you wonder, well Golly, it must've taken a lot of work to get there. So that's kind of why we got started and not another thing too is people would say, well, I want to share my story, but how, and so this is a platform for them to come and share their story.

Yeah, it's a blessing to, to have this space for someone to come in and be able to,

to inspire others and that's how it was birthed, allowing people to share their story, to encourage others to persevere during the trials of their life and come out victorious. Today I want to introduce you to our guests. Meredith. Hi. Thanks mayor for being with us. I'm excited to be here. We're glad to have you. We've been friends for a little over three years, right? And the moment we met was actually through a Skype call. And I knew we will be friends for life. Good old Skype bringing people together. But it wasn't for another six months after we originally met on Skype when we actually got to meet in person and that was in South America and we became instant friends and have shared life together by laughing, crying, eating some awesome street food and Zorka they called it and finally getting we um, we got into a taxi and we got car sick and the taxi was the size of a golf cart and Meredith is six feet tall. So you can imagine car sick and sitting squinched up in a taxi.

Well isn't that a taxi that I ripped the door off of? Yeah, same tax. Same Story. It felt so bad for that guy because I had to drag it on the concrete, get out of the taxi and I had to drag it back cause I had to close the door. So I'm looking at this taxi driver like, so sorry man.

And before he closes the door, he says, and you're going to have to get a new door. You're gonna need to replace this extra peso. But Meredith is most known as a kind and sincere friend who sometimes snorts when she laughs and loves her cat name Oscar, who we sometimes call Carlos.

Yeah. He looks more like a Carlos and he's, he's, he's not easy to get to know. He's sort of a it sorta distrusting. It's like when he first met us, he's like, you know, you would look at us funny and then he, you know, but eventually, yeah, we want him over and we're friends for life. I feel like me and Carlos or Oscar as you call them.

Yes. Well one night we did stay at Meredith's house and we, and she said, you know, he likes to leave the door open because he might meow.

Oh my word. That was an understatement. I remember that night. Please go ahead. Continue with this.

I, and I am afraid that a cat would come and just jump on my head or something. The cat did that to Emery. We were in the middle, like sleeping hardcore sleeping and all of a sudden the cat comes and jumps on top of Emory and I basically fall out the bed with a hyperventilation.

Well I think a pet cemetery just came out with a new one. I think they are rereleasing it or something or there's another one. So yeah, Carlos reminds me of pet cemetery. These are

terrible Oscar. Sorry it is Oscar. What's his name is Oscar. Oscar. I feel like you should be Carlos. Can you get that legally changes. Is that the same with cats and humans? But he's a sweet,

he loves us. So, well Meredith, we would love to move into your story and um, how you had to win ugly and overcome what you are going to share with us. So, um, what is it that really you had to overcome? Yeah. So for me, uh, when Trish started to talk about the podcast, Gosh, a year over a year ago, I don't know, I feel like we've talked about it for a long time and she had said, we definitely want you to share a story. And there are so many stories that I could share. I've just different experiences that I've had in my life that I've had to overcome. But I think what I kept coming back to, because it is a big part of my story and I know it is something that a lot of other people face. And I can remember in the season where I was really trying to figure things out for myself.

I would have loved to have heard someone else's story. Um, so for me, uh, in 2008, so 11 years ago, I was first diagnosed with depression and leading up to that I had just really struggled, um, with emotions, with just lots of different things. That finally, uh, led me to see a doctor. Um, and he said, I think you're just experiencing depression. And I was like, no, that's not what this is. Well, what was this specific moment though that made you realize you were depressed? Was there something, some action or something that made you say, hey, Whoa, I need to actually see someone? Um, yeah, so I tend to be a super social person, very extroverted. Um, I get that very like loved, just love to laugh. La. Like I would say that I tend to be joyful and I think in this particular season I was none of those things.

I just, it was slow to, um, because you know, you have a bad day, you have a bad week and that's normal. But realizing like, no, this is now turning into kind of a season of I don't, I'm becoming like a home body. I don't really want to like go do things. I just want to kind of watch movies and be at home and also would like get, would cry really easily at really random things. And I'm not like, uh, oh, the public's commercial just like made me weep. And so that also was like strange. It was strange to me. Um, so there were a lot of signs. Yeah. And so I think specifically, okay. The, I think the thing that made me be like, okay, this something is really not right. So I was like 2:00 AM one night and my stupid smoke detector started going off, get a little bit guy.

Yeah. And scared the bejesus out of me in the middle of the night I wake up and I'm freaking out and I can't get it to turn off and so it's just going off. I keep waving in front of it, can't get it to turn off. And so I called my dad and I was like, I don't know what to do. I can't get the smoke detector to go off at this point I'm crying because it's so loud. And at the time I was living in like a town, a townhouse garden home that has joined walls. So I'm also freaking out that my neighbors are waking up and my dad ended up driving down to my house because it was connected to wires and he was like, don't touch the wire. So then I'm like, I'm going to get electrocuted and die. And so then like I could not go back to sleep and was just like crying.

I couldn't stop crying. And so like normally, honestly that would have been something I would have laughed about and been like, this was ridiculous and so funny. But it just kind of set in motion this like really hard to sleep at night. I think just a lot of different things. And so finally my parents really, or who I spoke with and they were like, you just need to go to a doctor. Like it's not a big deal. But to me it was a really big deal. Especially when he said, I think you have depression. And I was like, no, I just, I just am having trouble sleeping. I don't feel like myself. I'm just listing out all of the token like symptoms, but did not want to believe that I had depression. So you said your, you went through your mom and your dad, but were your friends or others noticing this or, um, I mean, were, were they concerned or questioning you?

Cause, I mean, I know like since I'm your friend, like I know when you were down and out, so were others reaching out to you? I don't necessarily remember a lot of my friends like coming to me and saying, you don't seem like yourself. Because honestly I think like when I was at work or when I was around people, I could kind of perk myself up in those moments. Um, and I think my parents, both, they have suffered from depression and so I think they were just so much more aware of exactly like this. The things I was telling them, they were like, yeah, that's trademark. Like that's definitely what this is. Um, so I was probably more open with my parents at the time than I was with like other people. I mean, we can relate to that. You'll live in, in South America for three years, you know, and they coming back, the states,

people always told us, you know, when you come back, there's going to be a bit of a transition. But I was like, no, of course that's not going to be like that for us. Right. We're very outgoing, very strong willed, I guess, if you will. A, but I remember the first six months was very difficult. Um, no energy, you know, didn't want to be around anybody, didn't had no ambition. And I mean, I'm extremely ambitious. Yeah. Very motivated person. Love to work out and I didn't feel like doing any of those things. Yeah. So I can relate. I remember going to the gym and I would be on a machine and I would do a set and then I would just be sitting on that machine. Yeah. And I was like, okay, five minutes went by, 10 minutes went by. Yeah. I'm the weird guy in the gym sitting on a machine.

I don't, and I don't know how to, I don't know anything, how to do, do anything else. Like, I don't know. I can't yet felt like I was stuck, like couldn't even get up. And I was, it's so weird. Yes. I felt like I was, I was locked in my cell phone most, which sounds so dumb, but no. Yeah, good. Like way I think to describe it. Yeah. It was terrible. I mean, I had no clarity. I couldn't remember anything. It was just, it was horrible. So we, we ended up seeing someone and you know, it's helped.

Yeah. Because I, I'll say, I mean even when you talk about depression and kind of the path that you have to take to overcome it, um, when people, they, you know, we went to a doctor and the doctor's like, yeah, y'all have a mild case of depression. And I was like, why? No. And He, you know, was saying, I do suggest that you start vitamin D [inaudible] vitamin D and then we would just sit in the sun and walk around a lake and then earth

our thing. Have you heard of earthing? No. So I think we heard of it in, in Bogota, right? Yeah. And, but somebody was like, yeah, you should take off your shoes and your socks and go walk in the [inaudible]. It's called earthing. Yeah. It really was freeing. Well, apparently there's these, and I'm going to botch this. I'm s I'm sure someone's out there right now googling everything I'm saying, but there's a, you know, ions are, are, are something that's coming up that you're not getting if you have shoes on. But if your feet are on the, on the ground, on the grass, you're getting all that, whatever that is. I do love my feet in the grass and it does feel good. Right? So I recommend earthing if you're not feeling good. Yeah, apparently that's a thing.

Well, and I think kinda something that's even different for me and probably why I was really hesitant for so long is that at this point in my life, I had a great job, loved. I was teaching, loved my class. I had just bought my first house. Um, my first niece had just been born like, so I think when you, that's what I, when I talk to people now about it, that's what I like, want people to know is that I think we often are like, what was the tragic event that was happening in your, that made you depressed? But when it, when you really look at the, you know, chemical imbalance that can happen, that can happen in a season of life where everything seemingly is great. And that's why I kept telling the doctor, yeah, it's hard to, nothing bad has happened. You know, there wasn't, I didn't have like a tragic death in my family, you know, nothing like that. Um, so yeah, I think though, for like you guys and even in that, I think you can let that ride for a while because you are, you're like, well this is transition, you know, and it's two months in and then you're sitting at the gym and they're like, what's happening?

I don't remember doing that. And I remember thinking, I'm so weird right now, but I do, I have this, I can't, you know. So I remember even driving used to frustrate me. [inaudible] I hated driving when I got back, cause for three, three years, all we did was walk, taxi or buses. So driving was so frustrating. All the things I had to remember to dry with. So it sounds so dumb even saying this out loud, but I remember how ridiculous it was to drive. So anywhere, by the time we got anywhere, we were both frustrated like, oh, we had to drive here. Wow. Terrible is this, you know, 10 minutes of driving. Yeah. But the easiest, you know, the smallest things, we just set you off. Yeah. Just frustrated. So it's where, you know, I mean it just can sneak up on you on any moment

and then that's why it's just so important to, you know, if you are struggling with that, you need to, you know, see someone about it. And that's why I was saying earlier, we did see a doctor, but we also went to a counselor and, and when you hear counseling you're like, Oh, you must be real screwed up. But it was just a talk through and, and just have applications that we can take, like different things we can do to overcome that. And we did. And it just was hard. We have to when ugly. But, um, and a lot of the times too, when you're going through that, there is people tried to say encouraging things to you or

sweet things and they have great intentions, but sometimes they say things like, Oh, struggling makes you stronger, or it's okay to not be okay or nothing lasts forever. Just do your best. We're like people really kind of saying those kinds of things to you or, and you just would get frustrated with them or,

yeah, I think for me, um, I can think of like one particular situation where someone that I'm really close to who has never experienced anything remotely like depression, it's just hard for people to understand because they're like, well, you just need to, you need to make yourself go out. You need to go do something, you need to go to the gym or, you know, why don't you make your plans, right? Go, you know, why? Just get up, just go. And you're like, you don't understand how hard that is because I don't, I have no desire. I have no motivation right now to do anything. Um, and I think, you know, people would say it will get better, it's going to okay. And in that moment I always knew that I knew that it would and, and I knew, you know, that like this is not going to be forever, but it also feels at that time like it is going to last forever because it just feels so heavy and overwhelming.

Um, so I think it's made me more sensitive now to other people to not say all of those Cliche, you know, your tablets to be stressed or diarrhea, you know, whole different understanding cause you've, you've walked in their shoes. Exactly. Yeah. So what other techniques really have you? Yeah. Was it, I mean counseling, meditating, journaling. Yeah. So I a the doctor did put me on medication. Um, and that I think probably for me has been the biggest help because I think it really did just kind of help to balance everything out. Um, I know for me like getting good arrest is good and helpful. I love to be in the sun. I think just being like in nature I think is also our thing. Yeah. Get your feet in the grass. The beach. Yes, yes. Yeah. Yeah. So I think just learning more about what I need for self care, taking a mental health day and saying I'm at a point now where I'm feeling, I can tell now when I feel like I could easily slip into like I call it a funk, right?

Um, and if that goes unmanaged for long enough, it can slip into something more. Um, but that's come from 11 years of figuring that out about myself and figuring out like, yeah, today I don't want to do anything, but I know I need to. And making myself call a friend, Hey, do you want to go get coffee or something? And no one knows you. Like you exactly. Set those boundaries. Yes. Support. And I think so, unfortunately for me, I have tried counseling many times because so many people have said like, you should definitely go to counseling. And I've heard stories of people that had a great counselor that was just never, I don't know if I've gone into counseling with expectations that were unrealistic of what I was going to get from it. But I've just never had a great counseling experience. But I know plenty of people who have.

Um, I think honestly, probably the biggest thing though above everything else was just my relationship with the Lord. And really I think I'm thankful for like facing this and dealing with this because it's, it's that, it's those times that I realize how dependent on him I have to be. Um, and how he just meets me right there in the middle of everything. And you were talking earlier Trish, about like oftentimes we know somebody like starting point and their ending and I just finished reading a book and it talks about like the messy middle and how, you know, that's good. I like that a lot of times we don't get to know what the messy middle was for people. And so that's what I love is that, you know, I can, I can just come before the Lord at any point and, and just sit and be honest and say, you know, this is what I need.

This is what is happening. And I feel, you know, depressed. I feel this way or that way. And just have been so encouraged through the word and just through other believers that have said, I'm praying for you or I'm praying with you. And so I think, you know, just my relationship with the Lord has probably been the biggest thing that's helped. But I also am a strong supporter of medication. Well that's good.

Well, but would you say though, um, that you've handled it well, are looking back and from you into now, would you say that you really handled it well? Did you take all the proper steps that you needed to take? Um, kind of what about that? Yeah, I think so. Part of it for me is that for a long time I did not, I wouldn't, I didn't tell anybody. I didn't want anyone to know I was on medication.

I think that's another thing too, like as a believer, I think there is a stigma and you, and to like naturally we don't want to admit where we're weak. And so I think I felt worried that I would be judged. People would be like, why can't you depend on God enough? Why do you have to take medicine? I don't know, I just had all these thoughts in my head. There's a lot there. I understand. Yeah. Of How p even like you just said that people say, Oh gosh, you're going to a counselor. Like you must be really struggling. Right. And so I think for a long time I kept it to myself, um, because I was extremely insecure about it. I was very worried about what other people would think. So looking back, maybe I wish I had been a little bit more open earlier.

Now I feel very confident that it is part of my story, but it's not my whole story. Um, and seeing how other people have shared with me openly about their struggles and how that has so encouraged me. Like I want to be able to do that for other people. So, but I think as far as kind of the steps, you know, I guess maybe I'll, I only wish I had recognized that earlier cause I, when I look back now, I can see, especially like a specific period of time when I was in college that I'm like, oh my gosh, now I realized I was depressed. I had no idea that's what that was. And it was around September 11th, um, when all of that happened and I just, that was really hard for me. Yeah. A lot of people. And it just stuck. It just stuck with me for months. I just weighed heavy on me and yeah. But when I look back and kind of see patterns of things that were happening, then I'm like, that's what that was. So I guess as far as like, do I feel like I handled it well? Yes. I wish I had known enough to know

earlier. That's what that was. Right. Um, and that's why I'm Kinda glad you said that. One of the things you wish you would have shared more and opened up. And that's really, like I said, why the, the foundation of this podcast is because people really, they're scared to share. They're going to be judged or people are gonna look down. Motivation is a good word. Isolated. Feel like they're isolated. Yeah. They're going through that. I'm going, well you are. But man, there's a lot of people that are dealing with a lot of things well and even successful people, while they're successful, when they went through all the things they went through, they're still dealing with a lot of things. Yeah.

Well, and I think in this day and age of like social media, you know, typically all we see is everybody's polished. Yeah.

Perfect. Yeah. There we just got up in the morning that that photo would, they been up for three hours, you know, I mean, and they put coffee by them, but they actually haven't drank the coffee. It's like fake coffee, like a prop. So weird. Right. Unfortunately that's the world we live in. And so I think that too, yeah.

Breeds even more fear of, of being honest, of like, this is the crap that I'm dealing with right now because it's like, no, but you know, I have to have it altogether. I have to look like I have it together, even if I don't.

Yeah. So, yeah. And so it sounds like you're saying like you were refined and redefined as a person and do you think having to go through depression was necessary for you to become the person you are today? I mean, it sounds like yes, like you said, but has it really changed you and

yeah, absolutely. Uh, like I said, I think that it wasn't until I was in a desperate place of like, I hate the way that I'm feeling. I don't like that. I don't feel like myself at all of just really being desperate before the Lord. Um, and so I think that when I just look back, I've different things that I've experienced. I can just see what he has taught me, the lessons I've learned that I wouldn't know,

learned otherwise. Um, yeah, I think we are always a work of art, like in progress. And we all, and we're striving to be mature and complete, not lacking anything. And that's why it's, I think it is necessary. We do have to go through these trials and the trials make us better in the end. We're stronger. We're more equipped. Yeah. It doesn't feel very good at the time. No. But they're necessary. Yeah.

And then I think too, like the next time you're in a season of like, well this is not what I thought this was going to look like. The Lord uses that to remind like he reminded me of like, I was with you before. Like I'm not going to abandon you now. Yeah. Um, or just seeing like that, you know, like people would say this, this too shall pass. Like it's not going to always be this way. And so in the middle of that next trial to be like, it's, you're right, it's not going to always be this way. Cause last time it felt like that and I made it through that.

And it makes you more capable. Yes. I know the things that, that we've been through, whether it's I'm transitioning to another countries. Sure. Transitioning back to our home country, all of the different entrepreneurial businesses we've launched and all of the successes we've had with that. But of course the more things you do, you're also going to fail a lot more. And all the failures we've had about, you know, going through all that, at the end of the day, you almost feel bulletproof. You know, it's terrible in that moment, but you're like, man, I can deal with anything. There's nothing that I can't deal with. Yeah. So that is comforting. Yeah, very comforting.

Definitely going through all that. I've noticed that, um, I don't know if this is just because I'm getting older and more wise, but I have,

you're not older. You're beautiful. Thank you.

Um, but I have, I've noticed that I have to be really intentional on what and who gets my attention and um, and saying no to just things because I know, you know, it just is, it's hard to say no to things and you know, like, you know, through depression, I mean, have you had to just be extremely cautious of what you say yes to no to and even the people you may be hanging out with? Um, have you, I think that that for me is absolutely like something that I have had to learn over time. I don't know if it stems more from depression or more from being a people pleaser, um, that like it's hard for me to say no to. Yeah.

Do you want to say yes there? Yeah, of course I can do. And fomo. I don't want to miss that. Fantastic Fomo, fear of missing out. Wow. I did not know that. We've learned a lot about Trish today. I live under a rock. Yeah.

She doesn't know any movie or pop culture topics. Okay. So if I mentioned an actor or anyone that's normal like that, any everybody in the world would know like Tom Cruise or something. Yeah. I don't know much about Tom Cruise, but yeah,

someone that's a household name. Trish will, nobody's ever cast away. Okay. Oh Gosh. I do know Tom. Tom Hanks in castaway woe. She came back with like what she's from, where alligators. It's been, there's no, there's no TV out there. I do not like to watch TV. I do not like to watch movies. I am just not, I like to read, I like to cook and I just watching TV to me seems like it's wasting my time. But I do have things you choose to give your time to and not to give your time to use. This pop culture broadcast has been brought to you by the winning ugly podcast. All right, back on topic. Go ahead. It's just,

I just don't, but um, yeah, I don't, well, like to answer your question, I think that for me, I do think that like self care and just like doing what's best for like your mental health is, is so important to me. And I think that now I really try to encourage that and others, um, you know, to say, why don't you take it out off of work? Like, why don't you take a mental health day, go, you know, go to a park, go to a lake, whatever is like plane mode gives you life. This guy here. Yeah. Do that airplane because I think that we to something, something I've learned from, and I'm sure you guys have learned from living overseas is like, we come from a culture that is so driven by like being productive and like checking things off a to do list.

And that can get really overwhelming and really draining for me. But I also thrive in that. And so I think finding a good balance of like, you know, work and play, um, and rest, you know, for, and, and that's what I've learned too is that like arrest for me looks really different than rest for someone else. Um, and so cause some people cha recharge by bill being with other people. So you recharge by being alone. I recharge rubbing at the beach. I reiterate that. Yeah. But for me it's, I actually started calendering one day as a personal care day. Like I will not talk on the phone, I will not even talk to Emory. Like it is just going to be my time, whatever I need to do. And it's just been so good and life giving to me.

I think we've brought back a little bit of the Colombian culture too. That's helped us because they are very free and happy. They enjoy themselves no matter their circumstance. They're going to enjoy themselves. Yeah. Above all.

And we'll sit and talk for three hours without being like, oh shoot, I had these five things I really needed to get done right

there. And they're so social, they'll take their time with no matter what you need help getting over here, you need some directions. [inaudible] I'm late for a meeting but it doesn't matter. Texting, cancel now let's get you to that coffee and they'll really do that. They weren't here, this guy was actually eating a bag of chips and we needed directions. He throw these chips down and he's like, I'll go ride with you and show you where to go. I'm like, why do you have time to do it? Spend the day with you. Uh Huh. But Mirror. So you're obviously sharing your story here.

How are you using your ugly moment to reach others besides like on this platform? Has it helped you to reach others? What or what is it? Yeah, so a verse that I read years ago that has so stuck with me is from Second Corinthians one four and it just says he come first. That comforts us in all our troubles so that we can comfort others. When they are troubled, we will be able to give them the same comfort God has given us. And I love that because I feel like just this is, this is kind of one of my stories, but I know

everybody has their own story that they can relate to someone else. I've, I've walked with friends through divorce, I've walked with friends through infertility, through, you know, all kinds of different things that I just always think how beautiful it will be when you're on the other side of this, this ugly moment you're in and you then can walk alongside somebody else because nothing speaks more than being able to say, I just sincerely know what you're going through.

You know, for me, um, to be trying to encourage a friend who's going through a divorce. I can love you and I can encourage you well, but I can't say I know exactly what you're going through. Um, and so I think just, I think how I've been able to use it is being much more vocal and sharing my story with others. And I've had so many sweet opportunities with people. I can think of one girl in particular who she came to me terrified. She was in a similar season of like, I can't sleep at night, I'm crying all the time. I don't know what to do. And just being able to kind of share my story with her. And I think that Kinda gave her more confidence of like, okay this, I can get through this. And you know, just having opportunities to just remind people that they're not alone cause it is, it's like Emery said earlier, I think you do feel really isolated and like nobody else understands what this is like. And I think just for somebody else out there to know you're not alone and that you can get through this can be the most encouraging thing. So, well now that you're on the other side and you stand victorious, what is it that you really want to be most known for?

I think B I want to be known for being like surrendered. Um, and I think I want to be known for being a reflection of Christ. Um, and so in the way that I have handled this and, and you know, the thing with depression is that it's not like I, it's over. I mean I still take medicine today and, um, I haven't really experienced the low lows that I had in the beginning, but I definitely have those. Like I said earlier, like times where I'm like in a funk and I'm like, I can tell this is going to go, this can go a lot deeper if I let it. Um, and so I think just in those moments, like seeing that as just one more opportunity to like bring glory to the Lord and to not be so wrapped up in like myself and I don't know what I can do, try to get myself out of that.

Meredith, I'm, I'm very thankful for you coming on and we've heard all your ugly stories and they're awesome cause we all have these ugly stories. Yeah. But, but what are the wins? What are you up to now? What, what have those ugly moments produced to where you're at right now in your life?

Yeah. So I think for me kind of walking through that season, just looking, I mean, having the view that I have now of being on the other side of things, I can see how that kind of worked and moved in my heart to do a lot of different things. And so now I actually live in the Horn of Africa and I'm teaching English there. Yeah. Which, you know, I think, uh, like I've mentioned before, along with depression, I had just a lot of insecurity and a lot of fear, honestly.

Well, moving to the Horn of Africa will cure that.

Yeah. So a, yeah, a little, little over nine months ago now. I moved, move to there and uh, I'm teaching English there now, so I was a teacher here for 10 years prior. And so now

how was that adjustment moving to a new continent, a new country culture? How has that been?

It's been great and I think it's just a testimony to being exactly where I'm supposed to be. Um, because I think before I left, there were a lot of like, oh gosh, what if this happens? Or what if I hate it or what if it's weird, right.

Getting up and moving and getting on a plane and flying like 1418 hour long, long, long time. So I can understand that's such a big transition and just telling people that you want to do that. Cause I remember, you know Tricia and I, whenever we moved to Columbia, just that whole moment of us sort of realizing that we're doing this. That took a while and then you start telling people about it. And of course their expressions are, you know, in comments is always just hilarious. And you know, some people they say things you're like, why would you say that to anybody? I wouldn't, you know, they had no idea what to say cause it's so out there. So I know that can be a big transition. So that's,

well absolutely. And I know, I'm sure I have the voice of a 21 year old, but actually I'm not 21 I'm 22 yeah. No. So I'm 37 and I've lived 37 years in the South East us, I'm a southern girl through and through. I do not unfortunately have a horse. Um, no I don't yet. Any other stereotypical, um, southern boy, Huh? Well,

Trish wrote an alligator from Louisiana. We're both from Louisiana, so I'm just, I'm just, no, I'm just having fun. Anybody listening? I love Louisiana. I'm from Louisiana.

I did not ride an alligator, but what I do already know what she's going to say and it's embarrassing, but go ahead and say it. We're going to edit it out. Anyway,

growing up, W owl, we lived in the swamp, so hot tea actually in the water in the swamp, but we are surrounded by the swamp. Well, we had a pet alligator name owl whose tail was bit off by another alligator and my dad would feed him and he would come to her when we walk outside. He would run out of the swamp, come to our back door and have his mouth open waiting for food. So we had to call at some point, like the animal control because we could not get out of our door. He was always there.

That's mouth open. So I did not
right. And alligator, but we did have a cat an hour.

So not only was it an alligator, which is terrifying enough. This is an alligator that has been through things. So he's sort of a winning ugly. Yeah, he can be the mascot. So his ugly moment was getting his tail bitten off, hitting his tail bitten off. And He's winning because your dad is feeding him sausage. Yes. Wow. Lucky alligator. Incredible.

So back to my young voice and now it's talking about being 37 so yeah, I think moving overseas when you're, you're so ingrained in like your routine, your people is very terrifying. But upon arrival I just immediately was so at peace and just content with where I was and, and I think that for me, probably one of the biggest fears was like, what if I do slip into a season of depression and now I don't have my support. I, you know, because I do now have such a strong like support group here at home and just knowing, knowing the stories of living overseas and culture shock and all of these different things, I was very well aware that I could get there and lose my mind. Yeah. Um, I know all too well. Yeah. Because you know, it is, it's so different and you are, you're separated from all the things that you typically would

use to kind of help you cope with difficult things. So, but I think it is just testimony to being exactly where you're supposed to be, so awesome.

Yeah. I remember the first time that, you know, we visited Columbia a couple of times and each time we visited we always had locals with us. Yeah. They wouldn't let us go anywhere by ourselves. [inaudible] and I remember when we moved into our apartment, we moved in, we got into our apartment and I was like, I'm going to go out. I'm going to go work out. I'm gonna do it, put my gym clothes on. I was like, I'm going to go out and wait by the door. Stayed by the door. I was like, I'm going out right church, I'm going out because this happening. I'm going outside by myself. She's like, yeah, it's fine. You can go out. I remember it was like so terrifying to is our first time going out

into this big old city, 10 million people. It was interesting. It sounds kind of funny now. And of course we lived there forever and it was awesome and we had very few bad experiences. It was amazing. But just that first moment of opening that door just to, and I was like, this is okay. You know? So I understand

another thing too, like looking at you, you know you said you live in the Horn of Africa and like your story is that you, you were, you went through depression. Do you really feel like, wow, I had to go through that. I know you said yes it has made you a better person and you feel like it had you had to go through that to be who you are today, but even did it prep you to live there? Can you say? I mean, yeah,

I definitely think Kinda like what Emory was saying earlier about you kind of come through something and on the other side of it you're like, feel so strong and so like tough. And so I do think that in a lot of ways, like it did so prepare me on all levels, like spiritually, emotionally, mentally. Um, I think just to, like I said, better understand myself and better understand what I need to feel healthy and also to be much more, um, sympathetic and understanding of others and kind of what, what they're, you know, how they process things or how they work through difficult things. So yeah, I definitely think, yeah, I think it did just make me feel that much more like strong and that much more capable of doing hard things, doing difficult things. So.

Well, Meredith, thank you so much for joining us today. We've had so much fun. It has been a blast. Thank you for having me. Well, how, I like to end it on a fun, just joyful notes. So we're going to ask you some questions that we love to ask people. So are you ready? Yeah. And y'all, she does not know the, the questions were about to ask her. So Meredith, first question, advice you love to give. You just said, ask. Still don't know. Advice that I love to give. This is us. This is a, what do you call it? A softball. This is an easy one. What would you say be a champion? No, I would say communication. Oh, okay. I would say

vacation because if you just say what you mean, communicate with others, then life will just be great. Marriages will be great. Friendships will be great. Okay. I have it.

Okay. That's pretty awesome actually, Trish. Okay. Mad Advice I love to give is the laugh often. Oh, you do laugh often. Where's the snort? Sometimes there are statistics that prove that people that laugh more live longer. Absolutely. Don't Google that. I laugh often. Yeah, it's good. It makes you feel better about life. That's why I look like I'm 21 yep. You have the boys have a 21 year old boys for 22 year old face with a 21 year old. All. All right, we've got

another question. Okay. Good luck with this.

Yeah.

Second question for you, Mayor Kay, last place you visited or vacation. So the last place that I've visited would be the u s uh, because currently I don't live in the u s okay. So uh, yeah, that would be the last place I have visited Alabama. So you, the next question we have for you is what is your go-to or most often used Emoji? Wind Techs? Definitely the um, the like smiling and crying one that like, has the smile with the tears coming out? Oh yeah. Like your last name. [inaudible] not the normal end.

Is it someone that doesn't know if they want to laugh or cry or they laughing so hard. They're crying or laughing so hard. They're crying. Yes. That makes sense. Yeah. What about you Trish? Tell me the yellow. Oh, that's a sell out one. Everybody says that you need something else. Number two, which is second one. The poop Emoji. Oh No. Nope. Emoji is a good one. I like it. I do love, I like to pound it. I like to pound it with the pound. The pound it, pound it like after. No, not like that at all. I've never said that. I don't know why she said that, but I do like the Emoji.

The other Emoji I love to give besides the yellow thumbs up is the face with the only the eyes and there is no mouth and no nose because it's like I have no words, no words, nothing. I have nothing to say to that. [inaudible] and let's move on to rapid. Ever seen that one from you? Oh, okay. I'll start using it for you. Okay, so we have a rapid fire round. These are gonna be, you know, either or.

Well, first of all, do you read books? Yeah. Okay, awesome. Ask the first question. Okay. Well, hard copy or digital.

Ooh, that's a good one. I do love a hard copy, but now living overseas digital, I don't, I don't have space in my suitcase.

Yeah, that's a seven expensive. Did you bring that many suitcases full of books? Yeah, I'm pretty sure I brought a whole suitcase back from Columbia for you guys. Remember that box? Yes. Thank you. Yeah, and [inaudible]. Oh, I know how to keep it is so good. Columbia guys don't know how to keep it in. It's Caramel. Heaven. Do not tell a Colombian out of key bay is caramel. They're very prideful in their ad to keep [inaudible] and it's very different. Okay. Mayor, next one. Netflix or good old cable. Netflix, 100% for obvious reasons. It's 100% cheaper and you can watch whatever you want. Yeah. Except where maybe selection is not great. Yeah, I agree. Yeah.

Okay. Yeah.

Cake and ice cream or cookies and milk. Okay. Can ice cream white cake with buttercream and vanilla ice cream? That's

boring. Very specific. You're boring. I'm not a dessert lover.

Oh, she doesn't like this. I have to say this guys, this pause on the winning ugly for a second. Trish doesn't like sweets for whatever reasons or whatever reasons. She doesn't like sweets, so desserts, Asian or more happiness. But she has terrible taste in desserts. Cloud. She is. Oh yeah. A rubella. I mean, we talked about earlier, she's got a grocery store looking for rubella. Went there to find a Rugola. I would get a halo top. Yeah. So anyway, she doesn't like dessert. She doesn't like sweets. And I've learned to, when we first got married, I would ask her if she was out at the store, hey, buy something

sweet by dessert, you know, pick whatever. And then she would bring home things that were horrible. Yeah, they were not sweet at all because she's looking at things that she might want to eat. Like something that doesn't taste like dessert, like a rice cake, like a Sandy, Sandy, the cookie. Sandy. Yep.

We're calling sandy. Okay. They're atrocious. Nobody, nobody eats because the most recent, so let's talk about the most recent. A little tastes like this sugar in them. It tastes like wood, but she's like, I have pecan sandies Emory. Look how exciting you wanted something sweet recently. So we went to a drugstore down the road and the drug store out. I picked up the con Sandy's, he's never had one, so

no one's ever had one. No one's bought one ever at the store. The guy was like, yeah, this was five years ago.

Yes. I'm pretty sure growing up we always had those in the pantry and so we get home. He tries when he's like, Ooh, what is this? This is not even a cookie. It tastes like sand or sugar in it. Yeah, I mean I agree. They're definitely not my fav. Yeah. Hence why it's probably called Pecan sandy sand native sand.

Oh man, that wound my mind.

Huh? Mayor you, you brought up rice cakes and I am a lover of a plain old rice cake. Get everything on. Emery thinks it tastes like cardboard to put something on it.

Well, since we're rapid firing and we took a huge pause, would you like to be in the snowy snowy area or at the beach?

It's a beach. The beach, the sun, Sun and the sand and the water. All of that phone call or text. Oh Gosh, I can't believe you're asking me this. So this is a funny story. So what's your answer then? I'll tell the funny story next. I also only liked the text, but I do believe in you need a good old phone call. Sometimes phone calls, I would call Meredith wouldn't pick up. I'm like, what the heck? I would call her. I would text her about it. So the most recent thing that I put down is that I broke up with her phone because she would not answer the phone. And I was like, I know she doesn't like to speak, but she will pick up this phone. So now in my defense that currently I don't have a US number

and so I can only be connected over Wifi. So the phone sitch complications. Yeah. So it's not that I see you calling and I don't answer. It's that it doesn't really, not even getting by. I agree. I understand. But I do know in the back of your mind you like I bypassed, absolutely hate to talk on the phone. Right? Yeah. Well I just thank you so much for being here and I think our audience for listening today and I'm, I hope

that you are encouraged to go out and share your story and be confident in that and encourage someone else to win ugly. And just to see the, the beauty in our only moments. So thank you. Thank you so much, man. Thank you guys for having me. This was super fun. It was when the ugly moments come, remember that light shines brightest in the dark. Love radiates brightest among hate life stance most boldly against death.

Georgia (Anxiety)

Georgia (Anxiety)